Hairstyle A: How do I stretch my hair? B: Well, like a little garlic! A: Can you encourage me? B: It's a cute little garlic! A: Can't you give it a good look? B: It's a pretty little garlic! A: Can you praise me? B: It is the most beautiful little garlic in the world! Without losing the mother, she said to her son: Everything that is important should be locked in
The so-called evidence that a boy showed off to his classmates said that once my father accidentally fell into the water and saw that there was danger to his life, he was eager to gain wisdom and seize the two fishes swimming in the water, and it was safely on the shore. . The students did not believe that he should come up with evidence. Do you still need evidence? The boy said puzzled. My father is now alive and well. This is the best evidence.
5,000 ducks A male teacher was teaching in a classroom. In the face of a tumultuous class, he said irritably that the noise from two women was equal to the sound of 10,000 ducks. One day, the male teacher's wife came to the school to find him. The female student reported that: The teacher, there are 5,000 ducks outside to find you! Husband tossed the cat husband tolerant to his wife’s cat, grabbed the cat and threw it into the woods. Go home
Problems with stupid professors: A stupid question, 10 wise men can't answer. College students: No wonder I failed to pass the exam. After receiving the salary A: You guess what will happen if I receive the salary? B: Give it to my wife? A: No, it is deposited in the bank. B: This is a man. A: Then give your passbook to your wife.
Lying mother: Which banana do you want, Victor? Son: I want the biggest one. Mom: Victor, you should be polite and you should be small. Son: Mom, do you have to be lied to be polite? Do not understand English children poor performance, before the exam, my mother took him to the Confucius Temple to seek confession saints. After a few days, the score sheet was sent down and English still failed.
Filial piety dad, you can save money! What money is saved? child. This year you don't have to pay for textbooks for me. why? I have already stayed. Mom has love mom, you don't love me. Silly child, mother does not love you who love? Both of you, mom love. Why did you give your brother a brother, but did not give me an older brother.
In a fast-moving subway car in a subway car, someone politely leaned over to a woman beside him and said: The cabin is really dark. Please allow me to look for armrests for you. Unexpectedly, the lady said coldly: I already have handrails. Well, please let go of my tie. We say this breathishly. Why did you get a bottle and a woman to urinate in the toilet?
On March 7th, the child was required to undergo surgery, general anesthesia, 800 yuan; local anesthesia, 200 yuan. So he consulted with his father about local anesthesia and saved 600 yuan for the 37th. When the operation is about to take place, the child cries and makes trouble. To the dad, in this tense atmosphere, the doctor made an exception to allow Dad to come in. The child asked: Dad, this 600 yuan is my seven you three, right? Handicraft
Dogs do not bite the father and the son on the boulevard. Suddenly, I saw a big black dog barking at them. The son was terrified and hid behind his father. Dad said: Do not be afraid, child. Do you know that the dog does not bite this slang? I know, Dad. But does the dog know this saying? The graves of goldfish Chu Yang, what do you dig? My family’s goldfish died. I’ll give it a tomb
I had no food to come to our house. My father told her daughter about her starvation. After listening, her daughter with tears in her eyes asked her very sympathetically: Oh, Dad, did you come to our house because you didn't have food? The teacher of the pre-dinner hand-washing nursery asked, "Children, who knows why people wash their hands before eating?" A younger friend replied, "Teacher, I know, it is not to stain bowls and spoons.
The thieves’ three long-lost friends meet for a ride on a motorcycle and go to the bar to drink. In the middle of the night, the three people drunkenly walked to the parking lot to get home. A Jun searched the whole body can not find the key, said angrily: long heard of a thief difficult, did not expect the thieves have fallen to steal the key to sell scrap metal! B-jun reluctantly stood up beside the motorcycle and patted A-jun's shoulder: I fell more than you
In a fight with a sniper, the soldier reports to the general: General! There is a sniper in the stone stack of 20 meters ahead, but his shooting method is very bad. He shot a lot of guns these days, but he did not shoot one shot! The general said angrily: Since it was discovered, why not kill him? General! Are you crazy? Do you want them to change the rules of a gun? Playing daddy daddy, I came to play in the circus
The 5-year-old daughter praised Dad for helping her to do something. Dad: Dad is very tired, you praise me a few words, you praise me two words I have another strong. Daughter: Lao Zheng! Dad: Oh! Daughter: Your niu looks so beautiful. A birthday professor said to a precocious young boy: What was your birthday that day? Answer: April 8th. The professor said: Which year? Answer: Every year.
The unfair teacher asked two undisciplined children to stay after school and write their names 100 times. One child went home early after writing and the other was still writing. The teacher asked: What is going on? The child sobbed and said: This is unfair. His name is Hans Falk and I am Mohammed Ali Zaludin Bing. Haji. Ibrahim B.D. Raj. .
The tent was stolen. A and his assistant set up camping tents on the slopes one evening. At midnight, A pushed the assistant next to the star and pointed to the starry sky. Q: What do you think of seeing so many stars? The assistant mused for a long time and said: The sky is infinite. Each star is equivalent to a sun, and the earth we live in is only a small planet in the solar system. We humans
The teacher of the writing language arranges the student to write a composition for a small animal. After he handed it in, there is only one student who has only 100 characters. When the teacher is very unhappy, he finds him to talk. Teacher, I also want to write longer, but the kitten in my family was brought back just a few days ago. It was several times smaller than other students. I certainly wrote it much shorter than them. The student has reason to say. Compare the teacher, this lesson
Mathematician Humor A statistician meets a mathematician and a statistician tunes a mathematician: You do not mean that if X=Y and Y=Z, then X=Z! So presumably if you like a girl, then the girl likes the guy you will love Luo! ? The mathematician thought for a moment and asked: Then you put your left hand in a pot of one hundred degrees of boiling water, and your right hand put it in a pot of zero-degree ice water.
Reasons for skipping classes The teacher frowned and asked a student who skipped classes: Why did you skip classes? The student replied with a look of sweet face: I suddenly found myself very handsome in the morning, so I took a mirror of the day and found that I was really handsome. Selling toothpaste early in the morning, Kobayashi looked at painting scenes in the village with a painting box and quickly followed him to more than 10 villagers. He guessed that Kobayashi was a hawker, but
It was such education that Tom always had to listen to his dad's story before going to sleep. Dad: In the past, there was a frog. Tom: Dad, today I don't want to listen to fairy tales. I can tell science fiction stories. Dad: OK, there was a frog before in space. Tom: Well, Dad, to celebrate my 8th birthday, can I say that children are not suitable? Dad: Okay! Don't let your mom know. Previously there was
Hans piano replied to his friends: "My piano is awesome. Whenever I play madly, I will report time." When my friends did not believe it, I began to slap a few hands. Suddenly, the walls were knocked and clanked, and an old lady shouted: Do not quarrel, now it is twelve o'clock. Dad’s husband was still in a high couch on the morning of the weekend. His friend Tony had already visited. I quickly started to have a three-year-old daughter.